Monday, January 29, 2007

2007 ~ A Bannered Benchmark Year, already!

It just dawned on me that it's my ex-husband's birthday, today, and it's Mihow's too (go cheer her up!), and also my old roommies' birthdays, both Sherri and Heather... But for some reason, today being my ex-hub's b-day, thinking a bit about the past, it all hit me...

This year it will have been 15 years since I had first met the man I came to marry, and it'll be 10 years since I was first married to him. Although I know it's not true, I don't feel like I've accomplished much since 1997 - - don't feel like I'm where I'd thought I'd be by now. Then again, I never thought I'd ever get a divorce and high tail it to Las Vegas, did I? Also in 2007, come this March, it will be 20 years since my mother died... 20 years gone.


I hope those aren't the only two benchmarks to be reached this year. I'm tired of feeling acted upon.

P.S.
Noooo, no one needs to tell me that I've a got a helluva crappy attitude. I know it. I'm chiding myself this very second.

P.P.S.
I absolutely know that I have many a thing -countless things- to be grateful for in my life and I should be friggin' HAPPY, but I think my goof ball standards need a serious beating down. I guess my expectations are too high...

5 comments:

Susie said...

Hugging you.

Elizabeth said...

Days like that are rough.

Unknown said...

Sometimes, you have to give yourself permission to feel a certain way about things for a while before you can push that aside and feel better.

Love you, darlin. Hang in there. It WILL get better.

Anonymous said...

Hugs you, too.

Anonymous said...

P.S. What Kelli said:
very true, honey.Give yourself permission to feel however you need to feel for now.

I promise it will get better.
Love, love.